Lifestyle Choices: Leaving The Rat Race Behind
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I am in the process of a life-change. Not because of the current recession, because truly I hardly felt the effects of the economic downturn. Not because of some mid-life crisis, because mid-life is in my rearview mirror, never to be seen again. No, this change came about after years of introspection and asking the all important question....WHY?
A little background to set the stage in explaining this change. I lived most of my life believing in the American Dream. Bigger house, better paying job, possessions, if ten was good then twenty must be better. Owned twelve homes, made over $100,000, had the toys, nice cars, all the trappings of life. Interesting phrase, trappings of life! Because in order to fulfill the American Dream, I was required to work ridiculous hours, neglect my mental, emotional, and physical health, and focus solely on THE DREAM. I was, quite frankly, trapped, sinking in quicksand of my own making. And as unhappiness set in my best thinking told me that I must not be working enough, or not hard enough, or I don't yet own enough, so I picked up the pace, and the unhappiness continued.
For me this was a battle I simply couldn't win. Statistics tell us that unless I was in the top 2% of money earners in America I was never going to reach a financial level of ultimate security. Most Americans are one paycheck away from financial difficulties and that certainly described me, as with higher wages also came increased spending and debt.
Finally it all came crashing down on me in 1989....a divorce, a back operation, loss of a job....and a mountain of debt. The American Dream for this boy had shattered, never to be realized or sought after again. Out of necessity at first, but eventually out of a realization that it was right for me, I started making changes. I came to realize that no matter how many toys I have, they never could bring me true happiness. No matter how many homes, no matter how much money, no matter how much recognition for a job well done, I was stuck in that quicksand and would never climb out of it.
Fast-foward to today. The changes have come slowly but they have come. I have learned to do with less. I have learned to buy secondhand....I have learned to shop wisely and live within a budget. I have paid off my debt and I now buy only what I can afford without incurring debt. I own nothing but the clothes I wear and my truck. For probably the first time in my life I can save money monthly, and it is easy to do so. And here's a fact that may be hard for some of you to follow along with....I have virtually no retirement stash and really don't need one.
I am happy today with barely any financial holdings. I work at a job I love, have great friends and a son I adore, free time to help others and spend time with those I love....life is just good. And the changes that started from necessity back in 1989 continue today as I learn new ways to simplify my life, to gain more with less. It has been a wonderful transformation, one I could never imagine thirty years ago, and I am so happy that I lived long enough to learn an important lesson: money truly can't buy happiness.
To order my new Lifestyle Choices book on Kindle go to:
Viewed below is where I lived when this article was written; 400 square feet and all the room I needed for a happy lifestyle.
- Thoreau\'s Walden - an annotated edition
Thoreau's 1845 experiment in living well, with essays, photos, the Walden Express for students, and links to other Walden pages.
- Lifestyle Choices: Saying Goodbye To A Life That Wasn't Working
For my health and well-being I began to change my life. I had to ask myself what is truly important and what is just fluff?
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it seems as if we Americans are conditioned to go to school to get a good education, get a good paying job, have a home with the white picket fence. All these things are taught to us from early childhood to adulthood. In gaining all these things, we end up in debt, lots of unnecessary things that we do not need, and just being plain unhappy. I'm so glad that you have found the simpler way to living a happy life. Great hub!!!!!! :)
kingmaxler...thank you and I hope that same thing for you. All is requires is a willingness.
nina64...thank you and I agree completely. I grew up believing that you needed all those things you mentioned and I had them for a time...but there was no happiness associated with them and they left me feeling empty and in need of something else. I have finally found it and I'm not letting go of it...thank you for reading and commenting.
Thanks for a well written and interesting hub. I agree entirely and I wish you well
dainew, thank you for taking the time to read my Hub and commenting.
It's so easy to get caught up in the "American Dream", but I can also vouch for the fact that it doesn't bring true happiness. Thank you for sharing and I wish you continued contentment.
Vespa, thank you so much and I wish you happiness as well.
I commend you on a very well written and to the point Hub. We have been raised (Brainwashed) in this country to believe in the "American Dream" as you described it. I too went through the crash, divorce, serious illness and financial ruin. Today I am one step from being homeless and own nothing except the clothes I wear and my computer. And truthfully, this is better than when I had the $100,000 a year engineering job and the travel etc.
Thank you for this right on hub.
curiad....what a great comment and heartfelt glimpse into a problem that a growing number of Americans are facing. The old ways just aren't working any longer in this country. I wish you well and thank you for following along.
Thankyou for writing this hub! I think that more and more people are feeling that way about 'the american dream'. Having what you need, a home, work you like, and most of all having people in your life that you love and who love you back (and fur-folks too!) that is the best kind of life of all!!
pjpitts, I appreciate your words and I agree completely with you. I believe we are seeing the beginnings of a cultural and philosophical shift in the United States, one that may be painful at first but will eventually lead to happiness and contentment for millions.
I like your hub. It conveys my feelings too. That is why I work a 3 day week/9 hour days... to have the other 4 days to live my life and pursue the arts.
starstream, I certainly hope you are younger than I am and it didn't take you as many years as it took me to see the wisdom in that decision. I applaud your decision and I wish you well in the arts. Thank you for reading and commenting.
This topic is so relevant these days. I have been trying to figure out how to live more simply but still stay financially afloat! Thank you for writing such an inspirational Hub.
Sonya, I am glad you found this hub useful and inspirational. I am convinced that this country is undergoing a huge cultural shift that will lead to more and more people having to embrace a simpler lifestyle. I am happy that you are considering it and thank you for following along.
I've read the book "How Starbucks Saved My Life" about an wealthy advertising executive who became an Starbuck barista. The moral of the book (which was based on a real life) is that he loves his life much better working at Starbucks than when he was making a lot of money.
I couldn't agree more. I have put myself in a situation where money is not a need but a reward, and I am doing what I love to do. My life has never been so good. Thank you for reading and the timely comment.
So true! The only money we need is to put a roof over our heads and food on the table. It seems the "American Dream" is taking over peoples' lives more and more due to technology. People never "leave" the office anymore! They carry it with them in their pocket. Good for you that you were able to make the change.
Thank you Jennifer for taking the time to drop by. This is something I have thought about for probably ten years but finally had reached my limit. I can either be happy or live a life someone else thinks is proper. Easy decision that one.
The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat - Lily Tomlin. Love that quote!
We both started HP about the same time and this was one of the first hubs I read. Still very meaningful the second time around and apparently to others as well judging by the score!
Gemini, I remember well those first few weeks. I questioned everything I wrote wondering if it was good enough. Now it's just heck with it, here it is, like it or not! Thank you for returning.
kingmaxler Level 2 Commenter 4 months ago
I agree and I hope one day to live in such simplicity.